And now back to your regularly scheduled programming....

And it's not even a train.
Photo by Sura Nualpradid

I've been stuck in meltdown mode since the car problem occurred, and it's definitely time to yank myself out of my deep, blue funk. The last couple days I found myself stuffing my face and slacking on workouts, so it's time to put a halt to that.

Plus I finally got some great news!  Back in November or so, I applied for a position with a company that makes study guide materials for professional examinations.  It so happens that one of the tests they provide materials for is the pharmacy technician certification exam.  As someone who took that test and was a curve-setter for that session of testing (sorry guys!) and then proceeded to work in the field for the next 10 years, an evil little grin crossed my face.  I had to be a shoo-in for this.

I applied.  They responded quickly and sent me a sample to edit.  I dug in and realized that they had actually sent me a sample of a paramedic examination.  I went through and fixed all the grammatical errors, looked up as much information as I could to fact-check, then got my very own personal paramedic on the line (that would be my sister) to double check my medical info.  This trick has always worked well for me in the past.  I may not know all the answers, but I sure as heck know where to find them and who to ask.  If that makes me look brilliant, so be it!

I didn't hear back for ages, so I figured I must have botched something after all.  Oh well.  What can you do, right?  And then, a couple days ago, an email turned up -- "Sorry we didn't get back to you, we were doing a little restructuring, so on and so forth.... are you still interested?"  Hell, yeah, I'm still interested.  Sent back an email with that message (expressed a bit more professionally, of course).

Yesterday, I was officially offered the contract.  Attached were the details, a contract (nothing scary, just "don't steal our company secrets or set up a competing company while you are working for us" -- seems reasonable), and a W-9.  Signatures applied, forms sent.  According to the email, once that part is received on their end, I'll receive my full instructions and procedures and assignments.  I will be creating flash cards, and I get paid by the card.  From what they've described so far, I'm guessing I will be able to make about $30 an hour working on these.  Possibly more.

There's still some questions -- I don't know how long the contract or the project will last.  I think about all the possible information that could go on pharmacy tech flash cards and my head spins with dollar signs.  But in the short term, it will be a much needed influx of cash, a technical writing credit on my resume, and a chance to use a lot of info stored in my noggin that's currently going to waste (not counting phone calls from my mother-in-law).

It's nice to see some light at the end of the tunnel.

Do You Believe in Magic?

I do.

Look around you.  The stories are everywhere.  People doing wonderful things for strangers, spreading kindness, love and joy all around.  The stories about people paying off other people’s layaways at Kmart are particularly striking.  Can you imagine being one of those people who received such a generous gift from someone you didn’t even know?  The idea brings tears to my eyes.  I would love to be on the other end as well, knowing that I’m making someone so happy and making a Christmas happen that might not otherwise.

Just this past month, our family has been on the receiving end of several gifts and kindnesses from loved ones.  Friends and family have reached out in ways I never would have imagined.  You’ve heard about the Shop with a Cop program the kids got to participate in.  Just two days ago, two of my friends turned up on my doorstep with about two weeks’ worth of groceries, gifts for the kids, and much more.  Gavin’s mom received a special bonus at her work and decided to share her good fortune with her kids.  All of these things couldn’t have happened at a better time. 

While grocery shopping the other night, we made our own effort to pay it forward.  We purchased a gift for the toy drive at Fred Meyer.  I hope our small gift will make a child happy.  It's not a lot, but it's something.

On a forum I belong to, a discussion has been ensuing about whether or not to tell a 10-year-old “the truth” about Santa.  Here was my response:

Santa is analogous with magic. If he (Elias) believes in Santa, he believes in magic. I love that. I think we SHOULD believe in magic. I believe that magic happens. How many times have I been saved from the brink of disaster? Magic happens. It doesn't always happen, and it doesn't happen in the manner you might expect, but it does happen. And it doesn't matter what name you choose to call it: magic, karma, answered prayers... whatever. It HAPPENS. I want him to believe that good things happen when you least expect them. And that includes Santa. Take away that belief and all you have left is sad cynicism, which is no way to live.

It's been a rough year. But somehow, Christmas has managed to come together. We have some gifts for the kids, the family really came through, and the kids even got to participate in a special event "Shop with a Cop." It came together like magic. 

I don't know whether he believes in a literal man who is going to climb down the chimney on Christmas Eve (we are 2nd floor in an apt building, I can't imagine the logistics on that one), but he is more than happy to play along with it and he encourages his 3-year-old sister, and that makes me happy. 

I see no reason to tell him otherwise. Because I believe in Santa too.

Do you believe?
Image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

The Problem of Tipping at Christmas

Are you really obligated to gift everyone who has provided
you with a service this year?
image by digitalart

There’s a certain expectation around Christmas-time that pretty much every single person you had contact with throughout the year needs some sort of tip or acknowledgement.  As lovely as that sounds, for those of us who can barely afford to get gifts for our own families, it can put us in a real bind.

Blog posts and tipping guides abound this time of year, with advice on how to tip everyone from teachers to the person who delivers your mail (who I don’t think I’ve ever met, by the way).  One site that claims to be about frugal living offered tipping advice for nannies, personal trainers and house cleaners.  Clearly their idea of “frugality” is a tad bit different than mine. 

So what am I supposed to do?  When the latest tipping advice suggests $15 to $20 gift cards for teachers, child care workers, and so many others, where does that leave me?  My son is in middle school – he has six teachers every day, and that doesn’t even include the therapists and other professionals who I think deserve tips more than the teachers.  At 20 bucks a pop, that’s $120 right there, over half of this year’s Christmas budget.  I can’t afford to get gifts for my friends this year – it seems unfair to be obligated to gift these other people.

What are the consequences if I don’t tip?  Is each teacher keeping a list and checking it twice, marking off the kids who brought in a gift card and pledging as a New Year’s Resolution to be much kinder to those kids for the second half of the school year?  Will my mail carrier start spitting on my mail if I don’t leave a Starbucks gift card for him in my mailbox next week? 

If you have the means to tip and you really feel like saying “Thank you” to someone who has done an exceptional service for you this year, by all means, knock yourself out.  But if your budget is already strained to the limit and you are only tipping because of a feeling of societal pressure, maybe you should rethink the reasons behind your tipping. 

There’s plenty of ways  to say thank you and acknowledge gratitude without buying gift cards or giving cash.  A nice homemade treat, especially one that your child helped make, is a great way to say thank you.  Better yet – call up the person on the phone and say the words “thank you.”  I bet they’ll actually appreciate that even more than the gift card.  

My Favorite Charities

No matter where we stand, we should continue to help others.
Image by David Castillo Dominici

I’ve read my share of “manage your money” books.  And one of the major tenants of any program involves giving to those in need.  I believe in this completely.  Even when I am not in a position to donate money, I still make the effort to donate time. 

For example, I am currently donating my time and editing talent to DailySource.org.  This nonprofit provides an unbiased collection of news from different sources, providing a brief summary and a link to the source.  The site strives to stay free of left/right politics, and I respect that.  Additionally, it has been a fantastic place to hone my skills, and I have learned a lot about website editing and AP style. 

With the holiday season here, many people are in a very giving mood.  Before spending money on more stuff that you don’t need, consider making a donation to a charity that is actively working to make lives better.

Gavin and I support several charities.  Some of our favorites include:

• American Cancer Society – Not just about finding a cure, ACS works to help patients affected by cancer and their families.
•  Autism Speaks – I have participated in the walking event, raising money for this organization.  Autism has deeply touched our family, and this charity is working to find solutions.
• Boy Scouts of America – Elias is a Scout and it has done wonders for him. 
• Child’s Play – This charity was founded by gamers.  The goal is to make gaming systems available to kids I hospitals so they have something fun to do to take their minds off treatment.
• Humane Society – We got our Minerva from the Humane Society.  Before buying a pet from a pet store, check here to see if you can give one of these wonderful animals a home.
• Make-A-Wish – I think everyone knows this charity and its goal.  Make-A-Wish does phenomenal work.
• Northwest Harvest – A local charity that helps put food on the tables of people who need some extra help.  We have been fortunate enough to not have to use this service ourselves, so we will continue to donate food to this program.
• Northwest Hope and Healing – I did a 5K for this charity.  They work to provide help to women undergoing treatment for breast cancer, from providing financial support during the times they can’t work and even helping with child care during chemotherapy.
• World Vision – I am hoping to participate in child sponsorship one day, although I have supported this program financially.  I know people who have sponsored through this charity and they were very happy with it. I think this would be good for teaching Elias more about the world, as well.

Is a Good Deal Worth the Added Stress?

To what lengths would you go to score a great deal?

Photo by digitalart

With Thanksgiving nearly here, you know what’s coming next:  Black Friday. It’s practically a holiday in its own right.  When I was working at the hospital, the day after Thanksgiving was a paid holiday.  But what a strange juxtaposition, when you stop and think about it.  A holiday of giving thanks for all that we have, immediately followed by a holiday in which we desperately try to get more. 

While the original intent of the first shopping day following Thanksgiving was to help people get a head start on shopping for gifts for friends and family, it has devolved into a mad scramble to get the very best deals on stuff for ourselves.  Seriously, you really think anyone is going to give away that Blu-Ray player or TV they just scored a mad deal on?  

While I would normally be all over a good deal, I make a point of staying home on Black Friday.  Part of it is to make my own statement, and part of it is to avoid becoming part of the problem.  Good deals are great, but not when they come with the stress and craziness that is often attached to Black Friday sales.  Everyone knows the horror stories.  People being trampled in the mad crush to get that incredible deal and getting killed for their desire to save a few bucks.  Why do we do this?

Last night Gavin was telling me about a co-worker of his who was heading down to Best Buy right after his shift (on Tuesday, mind you) because he wanted to get the deal on the $200 42-inch TV.   Okay, granted, that’s an awesome deal.  But really?  He’s going to camp out for two days and miss Thanksgiving for it.  He’ll probably save about $400, but at what true cost?  He’ll need to eat for those two days, so I assume he’s going to be spending money on fast food.  He’s going to be cold and wet, it’s a typical Seattle Thanksgiving, after all.  And isn’t his time itself worth money? 

This opens up the question:  How far are you willing to go for a good deal?  I’ve detailed my efforts to make my own cleaners and broth, and I’m going to be incorporating more of these “DIY” efforts as we go.  I clip coupons (I’ll be talking about that later), but not to the point where it takes over my life.  I watch for sales, but I’m not going to drive to four different stores to get my shopping done.  And you’re never going to catch me camping out for two days to pay money for an item that, let’s face it, I don’t actually need.

Would I like a new TV?  You bet I would.  The color is going out on the old one and games designed for HD look distorted on it.  But for the time being, it’s perfectly serviceable.  The kids are happily watching Go, Diego, Go even now and I haven’t heard any complaints from them.  Well, except that the older one would rather watch Astro Boy, but that’s a whole other issue.

So what about you?  Are you hitting any Black Friday or Cyber Monday deals?  Are they for you or for gifts?  Are they for items you need or items you want?

When Thankfulness Doesn’t Come Easily

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, everyone.

Image by David Castillo Dominici

Sometimes it’s hard to find something to be thankful for.  The basics are easy – I’m thankful for my family and my friends.  But then I start getting nit-picky.  I’m thankful for my family, but it would be nice if my son didn’t have so many challenges.  I’m thankful for my friends, but I’m frustrated that I don’t get to see them as often as I would like.  I’m thankful that I have a roof over my head, but I don’t like where we live…  I could go on, but I’ll spare you.

It seems like for every good thing in my life, there’s something that could be done to make it “better.”  As you might imagine, thinking like this sets us up for failure and depression. While I don’t completely subscribe to the “Law of Attraction” theory, I do think that focusing on the negative constantly sets me up to only find the negative in everything.

I’ve been participating in the “thankful” game on Facebook this month, naming something I am thankful for every day in November.  The first week was easy:  family, friends and so forth.  But then I ran out of the big ones and had to really start thinking about it.  With so much going wrong in my life, could I really find 30 things to be thankful for?  It seemed like a tall order. 

I noticed that some of my friends popped up with their posts first thing in the morning, every morning.  “Luckies,” I sulked.  “Sure they have lots to be thankful for.”  I had to work at this.  But we’re almost to Thanksgiving now, and I’ve managed to come up with something every day.  Sure, sometimes it gets posted right before I go to bed, but it’s there.  I’ve also had to resist the temptation to show gratitude tempered by snark, for example “I’m grateful to have a car, but I wish the stupid heater would work.”  Instead, despite my crabbiness, I simply say “I’m thankful for a car that runs and gets us from point a to point b.” 

I think one of the keys to getting us through this tricky time is going to be remembering what’s important and how much we already have – regardless of whether we think it could be in better condition or not.

What are you especially thankful for this year?